i deleted his number
i deleted his pictures from my phone
i archived out messages on fb
i removed temptation to talk to him myself... the only contact between us would be a random text from
i found his number in the archived messages
i took a glance and committed it to memory (at least ill recognize when it comes)
i saved his pictures to my laptop (you know that thing i hardly use since i got my tablet)
time and again ill go on fb to see his face just because (becoming less necessary now)
in my own way im moving forward little by little.... to say my feelings are gone or greatly lessened would be a huge understatement considering the way im feeling now but
so many contradictions
i said i was over but i have my days where i feel the lowest and he's the only who could help bring me out of it
i dont know when or where i put so much into him, so much power he had on my emotions, so much hold he had on my heart
and its pathetic and makes me feel so.. so... BLARGH!!!
i dont want him to have this power.. this hold over me when i have nothing on him.
slowly but surely though, it will fade away and only the ache of wanting someone to just be a permanent fixture will remain.